My dad is still hanging in there. It should happen some time this weekend we think. We can’t figure out what is keeping him here. We have all said our goodbyes and told him that it is ok to go. He does seem more peaceful this morning and his breathing isn’t as labored or loud. My mom got in the hospital bed with him last night and slept with him for a while. Heartbreaking.

This is what is happening:

*He has been unresponsive to any touch or voice now for almost 2 days. He still has some involuntary movement in his left arm, raising it up to his face and back down. But other than that no movement at all.

* We still are giving him morphine and Ativan. On Thursday he night he vomited 4-5 times and we couldn’t keep anything in him at all. We finally had to call the on call hospice nurse to come in. He was very agitated and she got him calmed down. He slept through the whole thing though.

* He hasn’t taken any water or food now for 48 hours. No bowel movements. His urine in has been very very dark, but today it has lightened up and his output is very low.

* His pulse is between 120-140 and still pretty strong.

* His lungs are filling with fluid. His oxygen level is in the low 70’s. His cough makes it sound like he is drowning in fluid.

* I think he is having small seizures. His left arm curls up tight and shakes a little. He hasn’t had his anti seizure meds since Wednesday. We tried to give him some today and it just ran out of his mouth.

* He has 2 huge hard lumps on his neck right around his wind pipe. We are wondering if the cancer has spread. I have read different opinions about that. Some say that it can spread others say no. Whichever, he has something new growing.

We all sleep in the same room as him now. Every little cough makes up wake up/jump up. I think I have had 8 hours sleep total in the past 56 hours.

Please pray for him. Pray for him to go quickly. I just want him to have peace.


3 thoughts on “Update

  1. So, so sorry. I know the feeling of wanting them to go but terrified of it too. Your father’s ending sounds so much like my husband’s. All I can say is keep talking to him; we just don’t know what they can still hear or understand. I am praying for peace for your father and peace for your family. You have done all the right things and he knows that.


  2. Oh, my heart is with you. I’m praying for your dad and entire family. We just went through this with my mom, so I feel like I’m right there with you. Have the nurses given you the literature about the last phase of life? That was very helpful for me and my family. Hugs and comfort to you. It’s so good that you’re all there with him.

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